Funny what a recent set of internet questions can do to my train of thought. Well, not really, but that’s just where it sort of started. I think there was a question there “have you ever been hurt?” I personally thought that that was rather dumb question cuz I can’t think of anybody who’s still yet to be hurt. But nweiz, I read my friend’s answer (cuz I found it his bulletin) and he answered “pain is inevitable” which is pretty much exactly what I wanted to say. So when I was answering them, it ended up “pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional”. I answered the rest of the questions and went on with my life. I waited for Andrew to be online cuz I wanted to show him pics that I edited, so I gave him the link. I dunno what the hell he was really doing, but in short, he read the bulletin and told me about it and I’ve been thinking about it ever since. Damn.

Well, I’ve used that as a shoutout in my friendster before so I really didn’t think he’d pay anymore attention to it. It’s not mine however, I just read it from a fanfiction (yes, I know, it’s weird) and it’s been one of my favorite quotables ever since.

Why is my life so damn melodramatic? The Emo fever is so contagious. Don’t get me wrong anyone, I don’t think I look in any way like Emo, but it’s the attitude dudes and dudettes.

For some reason I really like drama. I know Andrew doesn’t like drama much. Ah, well, I can’t really tell cuz he’s mind is better than normal, its ABNORMAL (his words, not mine).  I don’t really know why I’m so into drama and stuff. And it doesn’t even have to be some crappy love story. It can just as hell be about anything, as long as it makes me cry. And it’s so easy to make me cry.

Oh wait. I take that back. It’s more like it’s easy to make me cry if I wanna make you see me cry. But when I’m playing the role of insensitive and I-don’t-care-what-the-hell-you-think-about-me bitch, you’ll probably never see me cry.

For that I should blame those damn and fictional anime characters.

Speaking of Andrew….

When I posted the drama material on facebook, I know he’d be able to read it, and even as we, ah err, made up, we really didn’t talk about it until recently. Cuz I called Topher a damn insensitive bastard, and Ayel plainly a damn bastard, they asked me what I coded for Andrew (note: when I said ‘they’, I meant Andrew AND Ayel), I was really still thinking about it and was about to answer “self-pitying bastard” when Ayel said “Mr. Triple A Battery”, and before I knew it, I looked at Andrew and said yes. Dude! Talk about untimely confessions!!!

I didn’t think it’d actually be funny let alone informative to talk about simple matters of the hurt heart, but as it turned out, it is. I learned that he had read it, and I learned that guys have a ‘resistance’ (as he put it) against all stuff emo and drama. If I remember it correctly, I believe his words were “I dunno, guys have a resistance against those kinds of things” and we went on talking about other people’s love affairs.

Ah love affairs…………..

For some reason, there are things I feel more comfortable telling guys than girls.

It’s not that I don’t trust my girl friends, it’s just that I just really don’t feel comfortable with the knowledge that they know this thing or that thing about me.

I dunno. Or maybe it’s just because I’ve spent more time with Andrew than with the girls.

But then I just met Ayel last year and I already feel comfy telling him things that I don’t feel too comfortable sharing with the girls.

(This is starting to be a blog about these two.)

Speaking of Ayel….

I think he got himself drunk yesterday or the day before that, cuz he sort of said something along the lines of “being drunk sucks”.

I so completely disagree.

There’s no better feeling than being lost in the midst of drunkenness. Poetic!! It’s the morning after drinking that sucks; the hangover, the feeling of wanting to throw up, the dizzy spells like ur the most pregnant person alive, now that sucks. But hell, when I think about it they’re pretty much worth it. I don’t think I’ve been too drunk to actually not remember what happened, cuz I pretty much remember everything, which is also why I can remember that it’s not really the forgetting, it’s the not feeling anything but drunkenness that I like about being drunk.

Complicated? Hard to understand?

Here’s a slightly better explanation.

When I’m drunk, I know what’s happening around me, it’s just that I don’t FEEL anything around me or even IN me, except the slight the-world-is-tilting feeling that I love. It’s like for more than a moment, I can just THINK but not FEEL anything. I can be a thinking, tilting machine.

Hehe.

I so love being drunk.

Now, if only I can think well enough to remember the anti-hangover steps I should do before I sleep so I don’t get a hangover the next day, it’d be perfect. Sadly, hehehe, everything has to have a price. It’s more of a question of ar you willing to.

Growing up with guys is probably the best and the worst circumstance in my life, but what the hell.

And the best thing about blogs is that, unless you are famous, or you have a lot of friends who are crazy about knowing every damn detail about your life, or you begged someone to read it, or you threatened someone with certain death unless they read it, nobody really reads them, which is why I somehow feel safe about posting this.

This, my friends who have bothered to read this, is the best thing about being a nobody.

Oh, and in case anyone bothers to wonder, “To Mr. Tripple A Battery” was the title of the drama material that I posted on facebook.